Sam’s story

This chapter seeks to explore the case of a female-to-male transgender identified client, Alex, to examine how a dream/fantasy organized around a sexual trauma was used to make sense of the complicated experience of being in the wrong gendered body and being misgendered by society. Alex initially struggled with his depression because he had been raised by what he described as a “good family”-both of his parents were hard working people, and his family would be classified as middle class in NYC. Alex internalized a rigid binary, suppressed any feelings of identification with men or maleness, and denied any unhappiness with his female body. As Alex became increasingly comfortable in session, he began opening up about how the discomfort he felt when he would go on dates with boys. Alex’s lack of clarity regarding his complicated relationship with his gender identity, his sexuality, and his place in his family was further complicated by his cultural and religious identity.